Ok so I do not have green eyes but I am kind of cute!
There is the emotional side to TTC that is often not spoken about almost seen as TABOO – The Green Eyed Fertility Monster.
Let’s face it no-one like to admit to feeling jealous but heck we all do at times and never more than when Trying To Conceive.
When people are diagnosed with an infertility problem, it’s almost as if women with baby bumps or prams appear everywhere you look, plus infertility can leave you feeling excluded from a privileged members-only club.
TTC stirs up all kinds of emotions, jealousy, sadness, failure, guilt, anger, frustration which in turn increases your stress levels, in turn, this could be making it even harder to conceive, this catch 22 again.
Feeling jealous of a pregnant woman doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you a human being – remember this fact.
Talking about fertility jealousy can be difficult even for the closest of friends especially if your friend gets pregnant. Be honest with her and tell her that you’re happy for her but also a little jealous at the same time and instead if talking about pregnancy stuff could we chat about other things.
Communicating your feelings in a constructive and honest way can help you – and those who want to support you. Most likely, your friend will understand what you’re going through and be supportive.
If certain celebrations like baby showers, christenings just feel too painful step away and send a gift, you do not need to give a reason and you do not need to put yourself through this.
Don’t feel guilty about taking care of yourself.
In a nutshell, it’s OK to be angry and all right to be sad, jealousy is part of the package too. These feelings don’t make you a bad person, they make you a real person, with real feelings.
Talking in a support group can often be a big help and the internet has opened up this area. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people online who are in the same situation as you than to close friends face to face who do not understand.
It can be easy to get caught in negative thinking patterns that will only make matters worse: “I’ll never get pregnant” or “I should have tried to get pregnant before, and now it’s too late.”
Remind yourself that your fertility problem is not your fault and find ways to bring positivity and resilience back into your life.
So how can you help yourself
Learn new coping skills to handle the situation you find yourself in.
Work on your goal sheets, relaxation, diets, exercise, meditation try not to spend 24/7 focusing on TTC
Simple stress management techniques can help reverse the negatives effects of stress on your mind and body and boost your chance of becoming pregnant.
Plus, managing your stress gives you a better sense of perspective and improved self-worth which in turn becomes a powerful tool in dealing with infertility.
Stress relief should be a part of every couple’s conception plan especially if they are going through IVF also it is very important once you are pregnant.
Trying to conceive can be tiring emotionally, physically, mentally and financially. It affects your spirit, mind and body.
Let’s face it ladies, we are very complex creatures and lifestyle factors can influence our fertility, so keep a close eye on your diet, exercise and stress levels.
So, keep working at the below
Give your sex life a boost
Make sure you are getting enough sleep
Eat a healthy diet
Getting regular exercise
Make time for each other
Alternative therapies like acupuncture
Be kind to yourself
Build up your self-esteem
Set goals outside TTC
Keep a journal this can help to see stress triggers and make a note of how you are feeling.
Remember no living in the past feeling regretful and guilty or living in the future daydreaming pull yourself into the present as you have control over this.